Alright DETROIT

Alright Detroit, you wanted the best and you got the best. 

The hardest working people in the industry, the Michigan Brewers Guild, the people who make the fine Brew that we Great Staters are so proud of, had what the Hombre is calling the social event of the season this past Saturday afternoon.  The north terminal at Detroit's historic Eastern Market was flooded with 4,000 brew lovers, haters, fighters, hoarders, movers and shakers.  Everyone got a chance to sample the wares, definitely some of the finest grog I've ever had the chance to guzzle.  We drank and laughed and watched people fall over and wait in line for the portajohns, typical day in Motown.  Capped it off with a smashing family dinner at Union Street and that is it.  If you missed it, SHAME on you because the stars were out in full force, here is the short list of all the fine folks that made appearances and hit this link if you want to check out the brews (too many to talk about here, again this is one you need to experience).

1. Eric Curtis and the Mt Pleasant crew that made the trek down
2. Johnny "The Greek" Rodopapadoploisous (I cant spell it man!)
3. Atwater Matt and the fur covered vixen volunteers
4. Dougie Scarlett and the Cannonball Wine Crew, wouldn't have been a party without you.
5. The Godmother Scotty D and the incomparable Candace (Go Blue)
6. Haresh "The English Tiger" Patel and Frank the Colombian Car Man
7. Melissa and Danny "Blue Skies" Bristow, he was not wearing a satchel either
8. Meredith and Eric Gregory, 28 years and counting my good man
9. The Shorts Mafia-Handsome Rob, The Woj and Scott NB
10. Party Joe and Ron from Liberty Street Brewing
11. Casey the Ambassador of Arcadia
12. Robert Woodburn and his friend Michele
13. WIGGS of Dark Horse, nuff said
14. Kurt Russells fat younger brother
15. Borat (Never gets old)
16. Mark from Rave - I was drinking and felt slited; no hard feelings
17. TC Beer Guy and his entourage, How did you all fit in that Ford Probe?
18. Isaac From New Holland, hope the car was intact and no police reports had to be filed this time
19. Ian from B. Nektar
20. Jason Peltier, The Clubhouse, its happening, believe it
21. Mr. Greg of the WAB
22. Keith from O'Tooles, new taps are music to my ears
23. The whole Schuett/Johnson Clan, Can't wait for the impending nuptials
24. Scott Graham and Eric Briggeman (SP sorry) the Guild Men
25. Rex Halfpenny of Michigan Beer Guide Fame
26. And Rick Ross!

Holla at me



Please and Thank You: Please, to anyone looking to get into craft beer.  Brewing, selling, drinking what have you.  You need to look no further than the Great State to get started.  And Thank You to the fellow who many years ago took the Olde English 40 out of my hand and gave me a Bells Best Brown.  Not that I stopped tippin the four-o but it did open my eyes (and my liver) to whole new game.

Keep Hope Alive and Drink Locally whilst Thinking Globally

Ninety-Nine Problems

99 problems and Bitches Brew ain't one. 

Frankly, I am not sure what the whole deal is with all of these super rare, allocated, only-available-during-a-blood-moon-whilst-a-proper-sacrifice-is-offered-to-the-Hop-Lord, brews out there.  Listen Troglodytes, The hombre knows about rare and reserve hooch.  Booze, brews and vino I've loved and lost (and whored out) many a liquid unicorn.  Doesn't make me a connoisseur, just privileged.  But for Keyrighst Sake I never saw grown folks go batshit crazy because they missed their bottle of Shafer Hillside Select or Lewis Reserve.  Consumer, Retailer, Restaurateur, Collector, Libation Archetype or Brew Hunter, I don't care what kooky Dungeons & Dragons class level you give yourself because you're all doing exactly what Dr. Lecter said you would...You Covet.  "Look at me!  I have a Dark Lord, a 120 minute, a CBS, a KBS, a Salvation, a Consecration"...what you have my little Hop Hobbits is BEER.  And unless you pop that top like a Michigan State Sorority girl, that's all you gotss.

Make no mistake I take no issue if you want to collect and trade brew like baseball errrr Pokemon Cards but I think, and here is the line in the sand, you don't know how to share like Winos do.  For y'all its all about getting the Grail but never drinking from it.  You're Beerial Killers, stalking down prey just to chain them up in the basement and that is unacceptable.  The people you worship like Sam Caligione or Joe Short want you to DRINK their beer and SHARE it with others so they may DRINK the beer as well.  Winos know this, whether its Petrus or Pegau its the chance to make 12 friends as opposed to 24 enemies. 

God forbid you get these trophies and then are able to taste them, talk about them and not just profit from them. 

1. Founders Canadian Breakfast Stout for $160 on Ebay?  You know who you are and I have a tack hammer and a whole bottle a baby powder ready to comb your hair back (pimp speak for throwing you a beatin'). 
2. 3 Floyd's Dark Lord R.I.P. for $1200 on the day of release!  What did you do for that cash, stand in line at the brewery????  Three Floyds donates purchase ticket proceeds to charity and you are looking for a 2000% markup? 
3. And then the noble beer store owner who gets a case of Dogfish 120 min IPA, curses his distributor reps mother, wishes winged monkeys would descend upon the brewery and then gives 12 of his rabid beer email followers the privilege to pay $49.99 for one 12oz bottle. 



You see what you're lacking is a sense of community, a sense of drunk debauchery that can only be experienced and cant be quantified.  We're here, we're drinkin', get used to it.  These brews are hand made by people who want you to experience them and then talk to the opposite sex of your hipster species and make some bad decisions. 

Its liquid art, not to just be stared at but appreciated. 

Please and Thank You: It's almost Halloween and nothing gets me in a lather more than folks who answer the door just to tell the kids to go pound sand, we got no candy.  Listen Psycho if your not participating turn off the GD porchlight or what have you.  It's about the kids; not you JackWagon!  And P.S. you pass out pennies, apples or any other crap, its getting whipped at your Prius.

Keep Hope Alive and pick up the check every now and again

The Takeover

The (SHORT’S) Takeover

It was ON, and when I say ON, I mean 18 handles deep ON.  Such was the scene at CK Diggs on a balmy Octobre eve.  The crown jewel of Crooks Road, with its 41 sexy beer spigots, and Short’s Brewing Company, the one and the only, took over half the draft at this fine Rochester Hills establishment and boy howdy did they throw down.  As always Mr. Chris Khami and his staff did an outstanding job slinging the brew and the food to go with it.  The Schuett Bros. from Imperial Beverage were on site to lend a hand and Handsome Rob Cutmore from Short’s Brewing Co. was running around shaking babies and kissing hands.  The order of the evening was damn fine and the loud mouth soup was flowing.  The rest is liquid history and for ya’ll to dream about. 

Tale o’the Tape

The 5 Standard Brews made up north by people who care

-The Magician, Huma-lupa-licious, Soft Parade, Pandemonium Pale Ale and Bellaire Brown.  All were delish and filling up samplers and pints frequently.  All too often I forget just how tasty these beers are and they maintain it on a consistent basis.  Beer so good you’ll want to smack your mama but I don’t condone that so give her a hug instead.

The Seasonings

- Nicie Spicie, Via con Dios Summer! This brew just gets better as the days get shorter, fully integrated with layers of spice and fruit, savory and sweet.   Noble Chaos is reason enough to party in the fall months, their riff on a Marzen with all the trimmings you’d expect from Short’s.   ContraversiALE , RIP Hangin’ Frank and it is saddening that the last bastion of brewing creativity where we have Bithces Brew, Little Sumpin Sumpin, Kind Ale etc and some of you folks couldn’t handle Ol’ Frank taking matters into his own hands? Well, you probably can’t handle this brew billed as a Strong Pale Ale with enough Simcoe for you people and the sipability that should accompany a beer this controversial.  Get over it scumbags, it’ll always be Hangin’ Frank to me and you can juggle the beans if you don’t like it.

The Brews I drive to Bellaire for

- Pontius Pilsner, Spruce Pilsner, Chocolate Wheat…love it when you talk dirty to me.  I go from 6 to 12 when I see these beers.  Pontius is a balanced hop-lager situated on a razor blade of fresh fermented perfection.  The Blue Tips in the India Spruce Pilsner make your mouth not only happy but leave it piney fresh and clean.  Choc Wheat is a malt rave where the “E” is free and the DJ is spinning flavors at you that you can not only taste but see.  Wicked good stuff.

The We already make Bangin brews so why not make more

- Publican Porter might be the best Michigan made Porter to ever slide down my gullet.  A great reminder that beer doesn’t need to have wild herbs or exotic yeast strains to be pure alchemy, think Turkish coffee with some of that espresso bitterness (And don’t worry kittens this one be coming in 6 packs soon) Good Samaritan is a straight up trip to the Cider Mill without the crying children, pony rides and wasps, cider meets beer they fall in love you know that old horseshoe.  Bludgeon Yer Eye Black IPA…so this is the trend now and some might say it’s actually not a style but more or less a spin on a classic. F*** Y** I don’t care this beer is magnificent.  A ménage a trios of Porter, Brown Ale and IPA, Straight up liquid porn.  Grashoppa threw me for a loop, frankly because I didn’t like it and well to be honest I didn’t understand it.  Not as dark as Black IPA and not as malty as a brown.  This beer is a twisted concoction of chocolate malt and hops that give it a burnt bitter sweetness reminiscent of baker’s chocolate. 

The Reason the Beer Revolution will not be televised (with apologies to Mr. Gil Scott-Heron posthumously)
- 2009 Black Cherry Porter, Whiskey Sour (Key Lime Pie blended w/ a Belgian sour and aged in bourbon barrels), Bourbon Barrel Aged Wizard.  Even a faint attempt at describing these beers would be folly, much like telling someone else about seeing KISS play Cobo Hall for the last time ever; they need to have this experience to understand.  Special thanks to Jon Wojtowicz of Short’s for scurrying around the brewery and scoring these rare barrels.

Matt Schuett & Handsome Rob

And for the record when it was all said and done…I finished the night with a refreshing Soft Parade, why would I do that?  Because I can, and that’s what The Hombre does.  Looking forward to the Next CK Diggs Tap Takeover with Atwater Brewery on Friday November 11^th.  Some more Great Beer from the Great State.  Stay Frosty Non-Believers…

Please and Thank You:  Everyone that came out to CK Diggs over the weekend, Joe Short, Scott NB, Jon Woj, Handsome Rob and all the rowdy folks up in Bellaire and Elk Rapids.  Short's Brewing Co. Brewed Up North by people who care, Sold in Michigan & Made in Michigan.  Keep brewing it up!

Keep Hope Alive and RIP Al Davis, A Commitment to Excellence

Change Clothes

Had to change clothes but I'm back...


With a big bag o'tricks and the pimp hand to run them.  Scads of topics abound, some pointless (How many municipalities are running restaurant weeks???) some peril (watch that new scanner law switcheroo doesn't get you) and some perishable (End of the Oktoberfest brew season & Great State harvest menus and the return of the elusive white truffle to Bacco) but all awaiting a good old fashioned social network tongue lashing.  We began drinking together and the table is hardly empty>>>

 

Please and Thanks: To all the Great Staters that have made 2011 a great year.  New businesses, new ideas, new hooch, and a new sense of pride that I feel beaming from every corner of our great state...but would it kill anyone to open a new Spainsh joint in Detroit.   

 

Keep Hope Alive and America's High Five in your heart.