Slow('s) Ride

Slow's ride, nothing better than heading down to Mich Ave for some of my favorite the Motor City's favorite food.  I know, I know...it's now the Hombres turn to wax poetic on the hallowed hall dedicated to hog, hooch and hickory.  Not quite, non-believers.  Yes, this place has been written about by major fish wraps on both coasts and boasted about in every periodical, social network and bathroom stall from here to Djibouti (the capitol of which is also Djibouti but the D is silent) and next I'm going to scratch out a post on how great Supino Pizza is, no sir. 

Rather than go on and on about the hipster palace hot spot that you might think Slow's BBQ is, I'd much rather talk about what Slow's is to me and on a breezy Saturday morning, it's the place I went to with my brood for my birthday lunch (for those scoring at home, 34 years-old but 58 from the waist down).  And  I hear you saying, "Of course you did" along with the rest of the suburban bourgeois, the waynestaters and the kids who have no idea what it was like to have Tiger Stadium right down the street. Well, you can suck it because what I know is the secret that makes this establishment righteous and what you know wouldn't fill a shot glass.  What is that secret, you say? Simply stated: The people.  The folks that cook, wait, watch, clean, order, fix, smoke and serve are the reason Slow's BBQ is tops in my book.  You wanna be a scenster, Absolutely this is the place to be, sitting next to politicians and posers alike covered in BBQ sauce.  But beyond that, you want to come in to place that makes you feel comfortable both inside and out, feeds not only your appetite but your soul and keeps your glasses full of libation and conversation.  Yo, I have had better BBQ and I know places that boast a bigger BAR but from the top to the bottom everyone here makes you feel like you are part of the place not just visiting.  The people know about the food, where it comes from, and the preparation that went in to creating it.  To go with that, the food is consistently great and the drinks, whether booze brew or vino, are always stocked and selected carefully.  They know the story on the who produced the wine, what whisky goes well with BBQ (all of them!) and where the crazy beers on the chalkboard are coming from.  While at Slow's, I've been informed about what I was drinking and eating and that has been enjoyably arousing. I have never been talked down to, in fact quite the opposite, its always like visiting at a friends place.

When choosing libations, and this is the difficult part, the wine list is paired for specific taste combinations, consult your server/bartender/chalkboard for application directions.  The brew selection is easy because their are no wrong choices.  They range from hard to find sours from Belgium to locally produced ales.  All of the beers on tap make for great hangover fodder, I stick to local brews from the Great State and possibly a side car of Gaelic whisky from the Shelf O'brown booze.  My go to dish is the Mac N Cheese (With apologies to the joint in Clarkston and everyone else that has found it necessary to combine, heat and serve this dish nowadays) and depending on my degree of hangover, if heavy-full on remove the ax from my frontal lobe, I stay vegetarian and go with Fries and cornbread.  If light-clear out the dust and cobwebs, I go with baked beans and a little potato salad and/or coleslaw.

The People are the thread that keep Slow's stitched together like a nice warm smoked pork snuggie.  Each of them in the know and there to help you fall off whatever wagon you might be on that day and then pick you back up.  I don't know Phil Cooley firsthand  but I do commend him on the locomotive he's been able to put together with remanded building materials in Corktown and the people he has chosen to keep it on the tracks.  It goes to show you that if you start with selecting top ingredients, what you can get from them is truly greater than the sum of their MF'in parts.  (Note: Slow's To Go is now OPEN as well)

Please and Thank You:  Thank You, Heather & Tara for the birthday lunch, for stopping by and chatting us up and for just being cool as hell.  Hugs & Kisses and Stop working so damn hard.

Keep Hope Alive and It's a celebration B****es!

Alright DETROIT

Alright Detroit, you wanted the best and you got the best. 

The hardest working people in the industry, the Michigan Brewers Guild, the people who make the fine Brew that we Great Staters are so proud of, had what the Hombre is calling the social event of the season this past Saturday afternoon.  The north terminal at Detroit's historic Eastern Market was flooded with 4,000 brew lovers, haters, fighters, hoarders, movers and shakers.  Everyone got a chance to sample the wares, definitely some of the finest grog I've ever had the chance to guzzle.  We drank and laughed and watched people fall over and wait in line for the portajohns, typical day in Motown.  Capped it off with a smashing family dinner at Union Street and that is it.  If you missed it, SHAME on you because the stars were out in full force, here is the short list of all the fine folks that made appearances and hit this link if you want to check out the brews (too many to talk about here, again this is one you need to experience).

1. Eric Curtis and the Mt Pleasant crew that made the trek down
2. Johnny "The Greek" Rodopapadoploisous (I cant spell it man!)
3. Atwater Matt and the fur covered vixen volunteers
4. Dougie Scarlett and the Cannonball Wine Crew, wouldn't have been a party without you.
5. The Godmother Scotty D and the incomparable Candace (Go Blue)
6. Haresh "The English Tiger" Patel and Frank the Colombian Car Man
7. Melissa and Danny "Blue Skies" Bristow, he was not wearing a satchel either
8. Meredith and Eric Gregory, 28 years and counting my good man
9. The Shorts Mafia-Handsome Rob, The Woj and Scott NB
10. Party Joe and Ron from Liberty Street Brewing
11. Casey the Ambassador of Arcadia
12. Robert Woodburn and his friend Michele
13. WIGGS of Dark Horse, nuff said
14. Kurt Russells fat younger brother
15. Borat (Never gets old)
16. Mark from Rave - I was drinking and felt slited; no hard feelings
17. TC Beer Guy and his entourage, How did you all fit in that Ford Probe?
18. Isaac From New Holland, hope the car was intact and no police reports had to be filed this time
19. Ian from B. Nektar
20. Jason Peltier, The Clubhouse, its happening, believe it
21. Mr. Greg of the WAB
22. Keith from O'Tooles, new taps are music to my ears
23. The whole Schuett/Johnson Clan, Can't wait for the impending nuptials
24. Scott Graham and Eric Briggeman (SP sorry) the Guild Men
25. Rex Halfpenny of Michigan Beer Guide Fame
26. And Rick Ross!

Holla at me



Please and Thank You: Please, to anyone looking to get into craft beer.  Brewing, selling, drinking what have you.  You need to look no further than the Great State to get started.  And Thank You to the fellow who many years ago took the Olde English 40 out of my hand and gave me a Bells Best Brown.  Not that I stopped tippin the four-o but it did open my eyes (and my liver) to whole new game.

Keep Hope Alive and Drink Locally whilst Thinking Globally

Ninety-Nine Problems

99 problems and Bitches Brew ain't one. 

Frankly, I am not sure what the whole deal is with all of these super rare, allocated, only-available-during-a-blood-moon-whilst-a-proper-sacrifice-is-offered-to-the-Hop-Lord, brews out there.  Listen Troglodytes, The hombre knows about rare and reserve hooch.  Booze, brews and vino I've loved and lost (and whored out) many a liquid unicorn.  Doesn't make me a connoisseur, just privileged.  But for Keyrighst Sake I never saw grown folks go batshit crazy because they missed their bottle of Shafer Hillside Select or Lewis Reserve.  Consumer, Retailer, Restaurateur, Collector, Libation Archetype or Brew Hunter, I don't care what kooky Dungeons & Dragons class level you give yourself because you're all doing exactly what Dr. Lecter said you would...You Covet.  "Look at me!  I have a Dark Lord, a 120 minute, a CBS, a KBS, a Salvation, a Consecration"...what you have my little Hop Hobbits is BEER.  And unless you pop that top like a Michigan State Sorority girl, that's all you gotss.

Make no mistake I take no issue if you want to collect and trade brew like baseball errrr Pokemon Cards but I think, and here is the line in the sand, you don't know how to share like Winos do.  For y'all its all about getting the Grail but never drinking from it.  You're Beerial Killers, stalking down prey just to chain them up in the basement and that is unacceptable.  The people you worship like Sam Caligione or Joe Short want you to DRINK their beer and SHARE it with others so they may DRINK the beer as well.  Winos know this, whether its Petrus or Pegau its the chance to make 12 friends as opposed to 24 enemies. 

God forbid you get these trophies and then are able to taste them, talk about them and not just profit from them. 

1. Founders Canadian Breakfast Stout for $160 on Ebay?  You know who you are and I have a tack hammer and a whole bottle a baby powder ready to comb your hair back (pimp speak for throwing you a beatin'). 
2. 3 Floyd's Dark Lord R.I.P. for $1200 on the day of release!  What did you do for that cash, stand in line at the brewery????  Three Floyds donates purchase ticket proceeds to charity and you are looking for a 2000% markup? 
3. And then the noble beer store owner who gets a case of Dogfish 120 min IPA, curses his distributor reps mother, wishes winged monkeys would descend upon the brewery and then gives 12 of his rabid beer email followers the privilege to pay $49.99 for one 12oz bottle. 



You see what you're lacking is a sense of community, a sense of drunk debauchery that can only be experienced and cant be quantified.  We're here, we're drinkin', get used to it.  These brews are hand made by people who want you to experience them and then talk to the opposite sex of your hipster species and make some bad decisions. 

Its liquid art, not to just be stared at but appreciated. 

Please and Thank You: It's almost Halloween and nothing gets me in a lather more than folks who answer the door just to tell the kids to go pound sand, we got no candy.  Listen Psycho if your not participating turn off the GD porchlight or what have you.  It's about the kids; not you JackWagon!  And P.S. you pass out pennies, apples or any other crap, its getting whipped at your Prius.

Keep Hope Alive and pick up the check every now and again